Iti in the Defence League

So in Estonia we have this organization called Kaitseliit (Defence League in English) to which I decided to join not because I am head over heels willing to die for this country but to know how to shoot something if I happen to stumble upon a gun and have at least the slightest chance to survive in case a war starts *sobbs bc we living next to Russia. So this time I went to the longest training I have ever had - 5 days living in the forest.

Packing was stressful as always. We have a list of things we have to bring but of course, clothing yourself is your own problem + my period forecast said I am also going to deal with feminine bonuses during my training so that was going to be fun. When I left my apartment with all my things, I looked like a turtle. I could just lay down, tuck my arms and legs in and I would not have been seen.

This is where you can hear me being out of shape!

So this Defence League is a big deal in Estonia and especially popular among guys with small wieners. Obviously, there are many men and women who you can take seriously (and definitely should) but also a lot of those who just want to belong in the Defence League to say that they belong in the Defence League. Before reaching the gathering point I saw a guy in our uniform fueling up his car and he looked like he was going to the biggest gang meeting of the year with his chest and arms puffed up (like a gym guy who thinks he has to turn sideways to fit through a door) walking back and forth with a smoke in hand. Chill dude! We just cannon meat! Nothing to show off :D

If you think that during these trainings you are always 100% alert, crawling on the ground looking out for the enemy, dodging mines and doing some special army stuff you are wrong. Most of the time you are just sitting and waiting for the command unable to do anything else bc the command can come in any second and usually does not come for hours so you just sit there looking at your shoelaces contemplating about life, listening to guys talking about the most "manly" topics (like poop and boobs) or looking for a private hidden spot to take a dump (maybe the hardest challenge and the most realistic during training in terms of actually trying to remain unseen). One time we were told at 4 pm to pack our things and hurry because we may go out any minute and we got an order to go out finally at 1 am. Not mad though because we saw about 80 soldiers falling from the sky with illuminated parachutes in the middle of the night. And we got a chance to greet them "nicely".

Of course we had to walk a lot carrying all the gear through a difficult terrain but it is a nice push on another level and I feel it is a better way to exercise than just going to the gym or forcing yourself to work out (I particularly am not good with inner discipline). There you can really feel how much you are capable or incapable of actually surviving. Also got a huge compliment from the U.S allies. They asked us how is it possible that our special forces have their names visible on the uniform...they thought that we are special forces :D :D :D But after looking at the pictures we realized that we indeed look badass enough to be considered more than just regular boring soldiers. I managed to escape the camera though.

Luckily this time we got home a day earlier - thank god, because my periods started on the last day and it was a nightmare to find a hidden spot amongst 80 people who also tried to find hidden spots from time to time. It was like a hide-n-seek with everyone else hiding and seeking to see if anyone else is hiding at the same time. But I must say, my team considered my needs at least at the first campsite, because guys in the other unit built a toilet and let me know that partly they did it to provide me with a proper place. What lovely souls. Although I needed it more at the second campsite :D I also understood that we might move again and it wasn't important in terms of surviving.

See the tree, feel the tree, be the tree!

So yeah was a lovely experience, learned a lot, realized that I have to upgrade some of my gear (someone please stop me from taking on another expensive hobby) and can't wear a dress for a couple of weeks now because my legs look like I have been abused.

Also ate a whole damn pizza and a pack of chips after an hour-long bath (we could not shower there even for once) and slept for 16 hours straight after all of this. Didn't know who or where I was after waking up. Now I am trying to become a human again to go to work tomorrow.